Should I insert my cliche "Wow, I haven't updated in a long time... blah blah blah." spiel or do you guys know the drill by now? ;)
I am currently sitting at my desk in my empty dorm room listening to the Wind Symphony concert's recording while reviewing this past year in my head. Holy cow. I feel like I just walked off of a freaking battle field with my shirt covered in dried blood and my flag held high. It was hard, but somehow I made it and I am officially halfway through my undergraduate experience!
Here's a (not-so)brief synopsis:
Move-In Day:
Crystal and I show up and have been moved from the room we switched to to another floor. Most of our friends were on that hall. *Cue bummed, grumpy mumblings*
HOWEVER, I am SO glad we were moved to the oh so special 129 West. I started off fairly bitter and grumpy from the mishap, but quickly found it absolutely impossible not to love the crap out of my hall. To start off with, it was supported by a phenomenal RA, Alina. I didn't know it was possible for someone to maintain a role of authority without causing that awkward "You're in charge and we can't really be friends" barrier, but holy cow, she blew that misconception out of the water. There is something amazing about stepping in to a new situation with new people and being automatically greeted with warmth and genuineness, which Alina and the others did. Our floor was one-of-a-kind; whether it be quirky messages on whiteboards or the weekly hall tea, my hall mates never failed to put a smile on my face and keep a sense of life in our hall. They were all also exceptionally neat when it came to our bathroom, so that was a plus. :)
Band and Schtuffs:
The Wind Symphony went on tour to California this spring break... it was awesome! We were there for 9 days, played 6 concerts and even squeezed in a trip to Disneyland where I once again met my favorite childhood bear, Winnie the Pooh. I did not anticipate the amount of appreciation I would have for this trip, and holy cow... what a blessing. It was incredible to me how quickly a group of 50 can bond. Towards the last portion of the trip, I was at the point where I felt I could move to any seat next to anyone on our bus and feel comfortable-- that just blows my mind. I am really happy with the community that was built over the duration of our trip and that I was able to make music with so many talented and loving people. It truly was a wonderful experience. I also performed in the Whitworth Symphony Orchestra this year and have gained a whole new appreciation for classical music. It was really cool being able to step in and participate with a totally different musical experience than I've ever had and having the opportunity to play side-by-side with the Couer d'Alene Symphony was an unforgettable experience.
Schoolwork:
I have spent the past hour or so tracking down every essay I wrote this year and was able to sort out some fun facts about what I have been doing this semester...
Fall Semester and JanTerm:
Essays Written: 18
5 short (1-2 pages) and 13 long (3+ pages)
Total Number of Words Written: 13,270
Spring Semester:
Essays Written: 41
28 short (1-2 pages) and 13 long (3+ pages)
Total Number of Words Written: 27,086
Overall:
Essays Written : 59
33 short (1-2 pages) and 26 long (3+ pages)
Total Number of Words Written: 40,356
I have realized this semester how essay-oriented the psych field is... it's a good thing I enjoy essay writing.
Other than that, I passed all of my classes (I am willing to admit and be proud of the fact that yes, passing was a concern of mine) and am on track to graduate with lots of empty room in my four-year plan.
Social Life:
This year was really weird for me. I think I have felt more rejection this year than I ever have before. However, the concept of rejection isn't quite the same as what I once thought it was. When I was younger, being rejected was being bullied or excluded, but as I've grown up, I've discovered that there is much more to it than that. This year I have felt very out of the loop and like people who I thought I was close with started to veer away from me. That is something that really took a toll on (and quite frankly exhausted) me probably more than I should have let it but there is something about lacking reciprocation in a friendship that can really put a damper on things. HOWEVER, those feelings really encouraged me to reach out to others more and I have gained so many new, amazing friendships this year, so it hasn't been all that bad! (I'm sorry if that felt like a downer of a paragraph, but this is my annual update and that's been a huge part of this year for me)
On top of everything, I have been so blessed this year to have my very special roommate. I am not kidding when I say that this girl has been my go-to and has not once left me hanging. I love the fact that no matter where we are or when it is, we are always having fun. There is something truly special about having a friend who you can just click with 100% and roll off of each other's punches all the time. But, on top of all of that, she is also the type of friend who will listen to you as you walk around the room in circles, flail your arms in the air aggressively, yell obscenities while ranting about something that probably doesn't even matter. Crystal doesn't have a middle name so we've made her random, funny ones in the past, but I swear her mother should have named her Crystal Reliable Perez, because that is exactly what she is. The room feels empty without my partner in crime and the summer looks bland without her, but I am just thanking the heavens that we will be housemates next year and will be running full throttle in to Round 3!
Aha! That reminds me:
Next Year:
A lease has been signed and cookies have been consumed. I will be sharing a house (well, rather a duplex) with 5 wonderful women: Crystal, Savanna, Nicole, Mara, and Tori. I am really stoked to get settled in and to adjust to a whole new phase of adulthood. I think we're going to have lots of fun. PLUS, we have a booth in the kitchen, so that's pretty cool.
A Thought Which I'd Like to Share:
Not many people know this, but last April (2013) I started treatment for Bipolar II and it has been a true blessing. Before then, I had forgotten what it was like to be content (and stable, really) and as time goes on, I feel that life just seems to get better and better. I am sharing this because I have noticed something about society and it irks me.
I hate how issues like depression and anxiety are starting to run the lives of more and more people every day, yet we act as if the epidemic doesn't exist. Why is it that when you pass someone and ask how they're doing the automatic response is "Good." And why is it that it feels weird on both ends if anything else is said? I hate living in a world where we all feel the need to conceal our struggles and try to take them on on our own; because quite frankly, sometimes you truly do just need someone-- anyone to be there for you and help you lift off some of the weight of the world. It does not make you weak to admit that you're struggling.
I hope that you really truly think about this, because I feel that it is a very important issue that society seems to overlook too often. Living in the dark by yourself is miserable, but it makes it a whole heck of a lot better if someone's sitting next to you until the sun comes up.
With that said, thank you so much for taking time out of your day to read up on what I've been up to.
You are truly wonderful!
-AT
P.S. Instead of pictures, I have attached a short video highlighting my sophomore year of college!
Peace!
